How to Increase your Emotional Bank Account (Relationship Banking)

Sometimes our relationships with our loved ones seem like a rocky road.  We are all going to have our ups and downs.  In order to keep our relationship on the right path, we need to make sure we are putting deposits into our relationship bank account on a daily basis. 
 
Now Relationship Banking is a similar concept to regular banking.  When we put money into our bank account, the numbers go up. And when we make a withdrawal, the numbers go down.  So in terms of our relationship, deposits are when we are attentive, we turn towards our partner, we appreciate and nurture them.  A withdrawal is the negative comments, the conflict, a lack of appreciation and empathy towards our partner.
 
The Gottman’s research into this found that couples where happier in the long term when they turned towards their partner more consistently then those that didn’t.  When couples turn towards each other, they are putting those deposits into the relationship bank account.
 
Every time we turn towards our partner, it lets them know that we’re interested, that we care, that we’re hearing them and that we’d like to help.  This starts increasing our relationship bank account we have with that person.
 
Here are a few ways to increase your Relationship bank account with your partner.

1. Leave the criticism behind.  No one likes to be criticized particularly when it’s from someone whom we thought had our back. Look for the positives of the person in front of you and build on them.
2. Learn to appreciate your loved one's even more.  Create an attitude of appreciation towards each other and make sure they know.
3. Lead with empathy and understanding.  All of us want to feel heard and understood though reflect back to our partner their feelings helps to assist in creating stronger emotional connections, e.g. “I can see you seem frustrated at what happened at work today.”
4. Practice turning towards our partner when they are emotionally trying to connect.

 
No relationship is without its challenges, though when we start consciously working on increasing the positive feeling and connection we have in the relationship, then we’re building a healthy bank account within ourselves and our partner.
 
If you would like to know more, than either visit us at www.bodymindsoulclinic.com.au.
 
Or you can call us on 5519 3338 or request an appointment to start enhancing your relationship today.