hOne of the hardest things we find to do, is to love ourselves.  It’s so much easier to just hate on ourselves, criticise ourselves or blame ourselves for all that life dishes out. Though were does that leave you?  Usually feeling like crap and believing in less that what we truly are.

So what is self-love? This is when we have and show respect for our own wellbeing and also our own happiness. Now this term “self-love” maybe a term that gets thrown around a lot these days, though the importance of loving ourselves helps the overall impact and quality on our life, and isn’t improving that something we all want?  If you’re struggling to get around the term self-love, may be use different words, such as being kinder, nurturing, and softer towards ourselves might help assist you in becoming more self-loving.

Like all behaviours, it takes time and practice in order for the behaviour to feel more automatic or even normal to us. Now this isn’t something that we can just go and buy at the shops, it’s a state of mind…towards ourselves. Self-love grows from appreciating ourselves in all that we do.  Its understanding that we are human, and humans make mistakes and treating ourselves more gently in the process. It''s acknowledging that we also deserve to be happy and we then start to take actions to support this.

So what can we do to start loving ourselves more?

1.Be more mindful. People who show more self-love often are more aware of their own inner thoughts, feelings, needs and desires. They are more likely to act on this knowledge than that of others. (See Show me the Monkey Blog for more information).
2.Boundaries. Boundaries are like a fence, you need to be mindful of what you allow through the gate.  Learn to say no or set limits so that you are more consistently protecting yourself. (See our blog on Boundaries for more information).
3.Learn to ditch the inner critic. Our internal dialogue has a lot to answer for and can often be the cause and fuel for more negative self-talk.  Start consciously talking to yourself in a gentler and more positive way.
4.Forgive yourself. We are so hard on ourselves and can often punish ourselves far to harshly for mistakes we make in life.  None of us are perfect and failure just provides feedback, accept yourself and your humanness more often.
5.Create rituals that grow self-love. Rituals are a great way of making sure we are adding situations or scenarios into our day that encourage self-love.  Turn the TV of for 15 mins or take a break from social media.  Weekly or monthly massages, or we can just pamper ourselves in some way.
6.Stop the comparisons. What often happens when we compare ourselves to others? We are the ones that often come up feeling worse for wear.  This can be detrimental to our self-esteem.  Practice taking a less comparative approach to others. If we are all reading the big book of life, know that some people are at different chapters to you.

Self-love might not always be an easy step, though it’s a step in the right direction towards caring for you in a healthier and more sustainable way.  Take time each day to stop and see how you can be kinder, more nurturing and more loving towards you.
 
 
If you would like to know more, then either visit us at www.bodymindsoulclinic.com.au.
 
Or you can call us on 5519 3338 or request an appointment. 

​We all have beliefs. Whether it be about the world around us (we call these Global Beliefs) or about ourselves (called Identity Beliefs). So what is a belief? A belief is a feeling of certainty about what something means to us.  A belief is a force that controls all your decisions. It influences how you think and feel every moment of every day you’re alive.  It determines what you will do and what you won’t do. It determines how you feel about anything that occurs in your life.
 
Beliefs have the power to control what you see and feel in the world around you.
 
What you believe in is a choice.
 
So how do beliefs develop? Your beliefs are developed by events that have happened in the past. Also by seeing what happens to other people or to our parents and by social influence.
 
Your beliefs have a direct impact on the way you think and behave.
 
There are two major belief systems that create meaning for your life. 
 
1. Global Beliefs
These are assumptions or generalizations about the world around you.  Example, “All men/women are bad”, “Life is hard!”
 
2. Identity
This is what you believe about yourself and about whom you are as a person.  Example, “I’m a strong person.” “I’m not smart enough”.
 
Let’s focus on our identity for a minute. So what exactly is an identity belief? It is simply the beliefs that we use to define our own individuality. It’s what makes us unique—good, bad, or indifferent—from other individuals. It also gives us a sense of certainty about who we are, which creates the boundaries and limits within which we live our life.
 
HOW IS OUR IDENTITY FORMED?
 
 
You might ask, "Isn't my identity limited by my experience?" No, it's limited by your interpretation of your experience. Your identity is nothing but the decisions you've made about who you are and who you want to be. You become the labels you've given yourself. The way you define your identity defines your life.
 
So this all being true, the great news is that our beliefs can change.  They will grow and evolve over the course of our lifetime, dependant on which way it takes us.  Though in all of this, we still ultimately get to choose of what we believe in. Sometimes it doesn’t feel like a choice, though I’m here to implore you…make the choices of what you believe in purposeful, empowering and uplifting.  You do have a choice, it’s just making the right belief choices for you.
 
To help us expand our identity beliefs, we have designed our 10-Day Challenge to push out the boundaries of what you believe.  If you would love to hear more on how to undertake the challenge, click here to see a short video of Michelle explaining how it all works.
 
If you would like to know more, then either visit us at www.bodymindsoulclinic.com.au.
 
Or you can call us on 5519 3338 or request an appointment to start addressing your stress today. 

So often I hear from so many clients, “Why me?”, “What’s wrong with me?”  These are common questions that I hear most days.  So why questions?  Well the brain does love answers, so when we ask yourself these things, it will give us an answer just to please us.  Though what if we could change our perception of our world by asking better quality questions?
 
What we focus on we feel.  Yes you may have heard me say this before, and you’ll probably hear me say it again.  Our brain is like a camera lens and where we point it creates the experiences we have.  Where that camera lens goes is what we focus on. The quality of our questions determines the quality of our lives. 
 
So if we ask a crappy question then we’ll probably get a crappy answer.  Though what if questions help us to change our focus?  To point our mind in a direction that can also help us see something better, more helpful and possibly even assist us in creating a more positive mind set.
 
So if questions are a way to direct our mind in more positive ways, then what questions should you be asking? Well that is a great question. Though before I get to that let me just share why using questions are a great way to change our inner world.  They’re great as they make you search…search for an answer.  We have to find something beyond what we would normally be thinking. So if that’s something negative, a power question can assist us in shifting a negative to a positive and also strengthen those positive mindset neural pathways. 
 
So here are some great questions to start asking yourself:

1. What am I happy about in my life right now? What about that makes me happy?
2. What am I most excited about in my life right now? What about that makes me feel excited?
3. What am I most proud about in my life now? What about that makes me proud?
4. What am I most grateful in my life now? What about that makes me grateful?
5. What am I committed to in my life right now? What about that makes me committed?
6. How do I love? How have I been loving today?
7. What have I given today? How have I been a giver today?
8. What did I learn today?
9. What was good about today?

 
Start practicing asking yourself better quality questions, especially when life isn’t showing up the best.  It’s a great way to start changing your mind set into something greater.
 
If you would like to know more, than either visit us at www.bodymindsoulclinic.com.au.
 
Or you can call us on 5519 3338 or request an appointment with one of our Clinicians today.