hOne of the hardest things we find to do, is to love ourselves. It’s so much easier to just hate on ourselves, criticise ourselves or blame ourselves for all that life dishes out. Though were does that leave you? Usually feeling like crap and believing in less that what we truly are.
So what is self-love? This is when we have and show respect for our own wellbeing and also our own happiness. Now this term “self-love” maybe a term that gets thrown around a lot these days, though the importance of loving ourselves helps the overall impact and quality on our life, and isn’t improving that something we all want? If you’re struggling to get around the term self-love, may be use different words, such as being kinder, nurturing, and softer towards ourselves might help assist you in becoming more self-loving.
Like all behaviours, it takes time and practice in order for the behaviour to feel more automatic or even normal to us. Now this isn’t something that we can just go and buy at the shops, it’s a state of mind…towards ourselves. Self-love grows from appreciating ourselves in all that we do. Its understanding that we are human, and humans make mistakes and treating ourselves more gently in the process. It''s acknowledging that we also deserve to be happy and we then start to take actions to support this.
So what can we do to start loving ourselves more?
1.Be more mindful. People who show more self-love often are more aware of their own inner thoughts, feelings, needs and desires. They are more likely to act on this knowledge than that of others. (See Show me the Monkey Blog for more information).
2.Boundaries. Boundaries are like a fence, you need to be mindful of what you allow through the gate. Learn to say no or set limits so that you are more consistently protecting yourself. (See our blog on Boundaries for more information).
3.Learn to ditch the inner critic. Our internal dialogue has a lot to answer for and can often be the cause and fuel for more negative self-talk. Start consciously talking to yourself in a gentler and more positive way.
4.Forgive yourself. We are so hard on ourselves and can often punish ourselves far to harshly for mistakes we make in life. None of us are perfect and failure just provides feedback, accept yourself and your humanness more often.
5.Create rituals that grow self-love. Rituals are a great way of making sure we are adding situations or scenarios into our day that encourage self-love. Turn the TV of for 15 mins or take a break from social media. Weekly or monthly massages, or we can just pamper ourselves in some way.
6.Stop the comparisons. What often happens when we compare ourselves to others? We are the ones that often come up feeling worse for wear. This can be detrimental to our self-esteem. Practice taking a less comparative approach to others. If we are all reading the big book of life, know that some people are at different chapters to you.
Self-love might not always be an easy step, though it’s a step in the right direction towards caring for you in a healthier and more sustainable way. Take time each day to stop and see how you can be kinder, more nurturing and more loving towards you.
If you would like to know more, then either visit us at www.bodymindsoulclinic.com.au.
Or you can call us on 5519 3338 or request an appointment.